I will be 14 weeks on Monday. I cannot believe how fast this
pregnancy is going by. I definitely have a bit of a belly now, although it
really only looks like fat, unless you already know I am pregnant. Although, this week I did have my first person ask me if I was pregnant
(granted I was rubbing my stomach and had just eaten, so I was extra big, but
still.) It was nice to have someone acknowledge that I was not fat.
I used to wonder why pregnant people were always rubbing and
touching their bellies, and that question has now been answered. Because it
always hurts. Not a truly "in pain" kind of hurt but it just aches, and feels
stretched constantly. Especially after a big meal. It feels like a balloon is
slowly being inflated from the inside (which isn’t too far from accurate.)
My big news for the week, is that I am now 80% sure of the
gender! Rebekah is impatient and couldn’t handle waiting until August to find
out, so she bought me the Intelligender test. It has an 80% accuracy rating and
it said BOY!!!
I don’t claim to understand God, but sometimes I
feel like I know how he works, and I knew he was going to give me a boy, no matter how much I
wanted a girl. I think one of the whole points of parenting is to force you to
grow (not just literally), and I am too comfortable with girls (which is why I
wanted one). Excluding Robert and Hannah who I was really too young to remember
their young infancy, I have “raised” 4 (or more) girls their first year of life, and 0
boys. I am not really sure what to do with a boy baby. I am sure they aren’t
THAT much different from girls, but all the boys I have nannied or been around
have been over 2 (and those were mostly the quiet indoor type boys).
For whatever reason,
I have never really been around boy babies. So I knew I HAD to have a boy. God
had to push me out of my comfort zone. Having a child at all is significant
growth for Adam. It will be for me too, but ESPECIALLY for a boy. I am a bit out
of my element with a boy. I would be too confident with a girl. Not the case
with a boy. Rather than me feeling that I have more knowledge it will be a new
growing experience for both of us to figure out together, and I am looking
forward to that. I am just more scared of my chance of failure with a boy. I will want an outdoorsy boy, but I am SOO not
outdoorsy. Boys are so much more active and I am just not sure what to do with
that. That will all be Adam’s department.
God has been very kind at slowly acclimating me to the idea of a boy (I think I would have panicked if I didn’t have any inclination and just found out at my ultrasound/birth that it was a boy). I have had the feeling since pretty much day one, and then I took the baking soda gender test and it said boy, and now this test. There is still the chance that my ultrasound will tell me different, but I highly doubt it.
It is so funny how I can be so much more scared of one
gender over the other. They are both babies who are going to completely disrupt
my life. Boys are just a lot scarier.
Despite my fears, in some ways I am glad it’s (probably) a boy.
I have not even thought of what I would do for a girl nursery, but I have a
picture in my head of what I want for a boy nursery. If only I could find what
I want online, but I think I am going to have to make it… but that is a topic
for another blog post.
Since I am still not confident enough to buy boy things, but I want to do something for our little boy, I have changed my blog to look a little more masculine...
Here is my gender test from today:
 |
| It's (probably) a boy! |
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